Viewer 48: Book Three game

Short Shifts · No. 03 · The Clout Pot

LOUIE LASAGNA · LIVE TONIGHT

On Ladle Live a viewer is a spoon, and a bought viewer is a plastic spoon. Tonight Louie has 47 plastic ones. Be the 48th.

Tonight’s stream

Warming the water…

Louie Lasagna on his stream, from the waist up: a lasagna stack with a baked-cheese top in a navy pinstripe three-piece and a red tie, both fists up, lit flat by the ring light.
LIVE 48 spoons (47 plastic)
LADLE LIVE · @LouieLasagna

LIVE NOW · 47 WATCHING

Nothing plays until you press it.

The chat opens when you tune in. Forty-seven are already typing.

    Louie’s ego:

    Louie’s desperation:

    How it works

    1. Tune in to Louie’s stream

    2. Reply with a preset line

    3. Every stream ends somehow

    The rules, in words

    The rules, in words

    1. Louie Lasagna is streaming live from his alley. There are 47 viewers, and all 47 are bots. You are the 48th, and the only real one.
    2. The stream runs in six segments. In each, Louie picks a topic: a safety tip, an unboxing, the terms, a feud, a sponsor, or a call to a subscriber.
    3. In each segment you reply once, from preset buttons. You never type anything, so nothing you write can reach the stream.
    4. Louie’s ego and Louie’s desperation are shown in words. Your replies move them.
    5. Somebody real may join the chat partway through. Be nice to her. Nothing on this stream can sign anyone up for anything.
    6. The chat scrolls by itself. Pause chat stops it, and Read the chat tells you what you missed. Nothing is timed, and you can log off whenever you like.
    7. Today’s stream is the same for everyone in Machattan. Tomorrow’s is a different stream.
    8. Mark Book Three finished, and the stream stays open after hours.
    Back to the stream: the game, as you left it

    The plain version

    After hours

    SPOILERS UNDER PROTECTION PLUS Opens when you mark Book Three finished. Coverage: Basic (free). Premium (also free). Platinum Elite (free, but Louie calls you).

    After hours, the newcomer in the chat has a handle you know, Louie greets her by name, and the stream has three more ways to end.

    1. Mrs_Kugel_actual Hello! How do I use this?
    2. LOUIE Mrs. K is IN THE CHAT! Welcome, welcome!

    1. Ralphie, on the walkie: “Twelve real ones. Plus the bots.”

      Louie, arms up: “TWELVE! That’s a movement, Machattan. That’s a REVOLUTION.”

      One of the twelve is you. Louie is counting you twice.

    2. The stream is over. The bulb over the dock buzzes.

      Louie: “Twenty-three people.”

      Ralphie: “Twenty-three is more than zero.”

      Ralphie writes it down, and underlines it.

    3. INCOMING CALL: UNCLE.

      Louie answers on speaker, by mistake. One voice, no hurry: “Stop. Streaming.”

      The count says zero. Nobody remembers to end the stream.

    Highlights from last night’s stream

    The plain version: a transcript, readable without JavaScript. Same alley, same ring light, same 47.

    1. LOUIE What’s UP, Machattan, it’s your boy Louie Lasagna, coming at you LIVE from the alley. Forty-seven spoons in the chat already. Look at that turnout.
    2. bot_4729 first
    3. user_fake_38 mid
    4. LOUIE SAFETY TIP OF THE DAY, spoons. Over eighty percent humidity, do NOT lean on a wall. Walls are where things stick.
    5. RALPHIE He leaned on a wall on Thursday. It took two of us.
    6. viewer 48 is this a scam
    7. LOUIE Great question! Great engagement! The answer is TIERS.
    8. first_time_here Hello? Is this the program with the man in the suit?
    9. LOUIE Ma’am, I see you, and I want you to know: we have a SENIOR rate. Sliding scale. Not too sliding.
    10. first_time_here Lovely. Discounted from what, dear?
    11. viewer 48 @first_time_here heads up, this is a sales pitch
    12. first_time_here I know, dear. I’ve been pitched by better. I married one of them.
    13. RALPHIE Courtesy call, PREMIUM tier, a subscriber on Broth Street. I will put him on speaker.
    14. SUBSCRIBER Is this the young man with the clipboard? I have a radiator question. It knocks.
    15. viewer 48 ralphie stay on the call
    16. RALPHIE The card says to end the call here. I can stay. It is still a call.
    17. first_time_here You have a lovely face for the radio, dear. I mean that. I love the radio.
    18. viewer 48 (sent a drop)
    19. LOUIE A DROP. A real drop, chat, from a real spoon. Ralphie, frame it.
    20. RALPHIE It is digital. I will frame the idea of it.
    21. STREAM Stream ended. Peak spoons: 48 (47 plastic). Drops: one, from you. Louie says it counts.
    Back to the stream: the game, as you left it